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Saturday, August 29, 2020

FIGHTING CORONA IN UTOPIA

Utopia is no man's land. It exists nowhere.  But it is omnipresent.
In Utopia if you have to see a Doctor for a lifestyle disease, you have to undergo a Corona test. Interesting part is you do the test today and see the doctor tomorrow with a Covid 19 negative certificate. But what is the assurance you are not Covid 19 positive on the day you see the doctor? 
Mandates are mandates.
Now you can hoodwink Corona, visiting the doctor on the Zoom platform. The good doctor charges you double what you pay on a personal visit on the zoom consultation. You have to upload the scanned copies of the reports for the doctor's perusal. You have to be tech savy. And the commandment of the omnipotent is that you are under reverse quarantine. Venturing out is taboo.  The proclamation prohibits misadventure or misdemeanour or activism on your part. You will be severely dealt with.
The doctor initiates the consultation only after the fee is debited from your account and traverses the long or short  distance to the doctor's account. The doctor finally advises you to repeat the medicines for two weeks and sets the date for the next consultation. Long live the doctors.
In Utopia if you are Covid 19 positive, the law enforcers and the health personnel force you to pay US Dollars 5000.00 and get into the private hospital of their choice.  If you reject the offer you will be plainly told that it would be inconvenient for you if you attempt to be treated at the common man's facility. 
Say no, Utopia is Utopia and you would be quarantined for 60 days and you would  starve. in a facility that has no facilities. 
  

Monday, August 10, 2020

SHATTERED LIVES


Ammachi - Dr. Annamma George, our mother - had passed away on 5th August 2020. She was 95, sixteen days from celebrating her 96th Birthday. 

Anna Kochamma was solid gold. 

How are you all holding up?

We find the going tough. 

For Lila it's the loss of her dear mother. 

Yesterday she was telling me, "At times I wonder, did we do everything well for Ammachi." 

Has an iota of suspicion we didn't do everything right all through the years we had stayed with her

I assured her it isn't

You did everything possible.
Don't even think otherwise

I miss her everywhere I look for her. She's not on her seat at the dining table. She's not in her room. She's not on her bed. She's everywhere, but nowhere. There she is getting up in the morning, emerges from her room holding a flask close to her body, walks slowly to the kitchen. She sits there on a chair at the kitchen, swallows a full mug of hot water with glum,glum and enjoys her tea.

Returns to her room with the flask of hot water. 

She did all this routinely each day of her life till  7th June 2020. It differed on the 8th. She was hospitalised - the first admission - in the night that day. There were three admissions in as many weeks.

There was visible disorientation in the morning. The routine was broken. Later she came round. Went on as usual. We didn't think much of it as normalcy had been restored.

I am sitting on my chair observing all this while scanning the newspapers.

Where is she? 

I miss her.

Ashwin had a special relationship with her.

Anoop too.

They miss her. 

Aaron was crying aloud seeing her inert.

Little Evana was telling us yesterday when we were in Ammachi's room, "Valiyam illa"
(Great Gandma is not here), looking at the vacant bed.

Sunday, August 9, 2020

LOCKDOWN STRESS BUSTER

True, Lila finds joy in stitching.

But I am amazed she's doing it when she's under a  multiple  lockdown(not the triple lockdown of the authorities)

It's the stress.
She's not growing young.
She has her invalid mother whom she cares for alone with love and affection.
Not the paid stuff where you never receive your money's worth.
She cares for everyone in the house ensuring they don't lack in anything.
She has been confined to  home since March except when she looked after Ammachi at the Hospital.
She doesn't complain.

Yet, she finds time to express herself in one of her favourite pastimes. Says it relaxes her. 

The caption in three words eloquently captures all this and much and much more.

BOY MEETS GIRL

A little bit of History. 

These days no one is interested in that. If you set out with a historical narration you can see people are disinterested. They are  impatient with you for your intrusion into their secluded egotistic life. 


November 20 1977. 

A 27 year old young man and his 24 year old sister had set out from their abode. They took the Fast Passenger to Trivandrum. They were seen off by their father and mother. The mother was recuperating. She had been critically ill and was just out of the Hospital. 

The long journey was to meet the girl and her family in  Trivandrum. There was the proposal. 

When the young man met the girl he told her explicitly that his mother was suffering from an incurable disease. He left it to the girl to choose.

The marriage took place on December 29  1977.

The girl stepped happily into a house that had been steeped in  inadequacies. The mother soon had a relapse. She was admitted in a premium hospital. Almost two months later she was discharged with the doctor's remark, 'Prognosis given.'

She was brought home. After a few days she had slipped into a coma.

The beautiful girl who had become a part of the family through marriage -   three months old - took in the crisis with a composure that astounded her husband.
She took care of the mother in the best way possible. The girl who had just left a home of plenty and comfort had no hesitation in looking after her newly acquired mother in law. She had no inhibition in cleaning up or feeding the invalid.
There was love, love and love. There was affection , affection and affection. 
How many would replicate her? Not many, I am sure. 

Many moments came alive at once.

The young girl now is a proud grandmother. She had her own space in the world when she had been  employed.

Unmindful of whatever she had been or whatever she could not be she leads a happy contented life. She passes oñ, transmits and transcribes the quality ingrained in her. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE and AFFECTION, AFFECTION  and AFFECTION. 

Some people are like that. Again not many. They are rare. They are unusual. The legacy, impossible  to replicate.

Here she is looking after and supporting four generations as her niece has rightly mentioned.

She looks after her mother and cares for her happily. 

She's Lila, our Lila.

True, the bar has been set high.

INTERACTIONS

 Actually I don't know what to pray for.
 God will bless you all 
 It is tough to go through all this now, but we have no choice.
 You said it. 
Most inconvenient time for illnesses to strike.
You know very well except in Okinawa Japan and a few other pockets in the world no one lives upto 120 years.
Just as there is a time to begin, there is a time for the end. When? No one has any idea. 
When it is your dear ones you don't even want to let them go. But,go, they must. The pain is acute.

One thing we can always ensure. They have a good and comfortable life till the very end. Painless is our wish.  Money doesn't matter. Inconsequential. 

Lila has the toughest phase ever in her life. She's not growing young either. We support her to the utmost. Not enough we know. 

Prayer is the sole solace. Man needs at least a straw to hold on to.

Ammachi is comparatively better. But the invalid status must be demeaning for a woman of her calibre, strong willed and self made as she is.

Corona does its best to aggravate and compound the problems we have. It depresses and debilitates the individual. Lethargy steps in. 

From another angle it's quite funny.There's humour too.

I am sending two photos of Lila. Casual.

Lila fires me for sending the two photos.  I said I had sent them to very few who I felt think well of us. 
Assured I'll ask them all to delete the photos if she detests my well meant but to her very unbecoming and  untoward  action. Have to buy peace. She keeps a silence, but silence is much  more than eloquent.
All the same go for deletion if you feel they are that bad. Else assure her they are the best photos of your dearest aunt.

We survive because of such major minor tiffs.
 They are kept safely. I gazed at them for more than a while and felt really good. Glad we got 'em
 This is Lila. The pics showed  a tired old lady with a weary look  - not worthy to be seen by my  favourite  niece  at U S.
 Lalchaya, you know I observe people. My neighbor on one side is my mother's age. She spends her whole day gardening. Otherwise there's nothing for her to do with her day.
 Met another lady in her sixties... Was buying 10-20 books at some sale. Said these books will let her get past more than a month. She has nothing else to do.
I thought of my mother and Lilamama..
 They don't need to look at a day and wonder how to spend it.
 My mother said Lilamama is dealing with the pressures of 4 generations. We must support her as much as we can.
 But we don't realize is this is her legacy. She has set the bar high for the rest of us. God will bless her and give her strength.

Compilation - CAN DO WILL DO MUST DO

The Post -  CAN DO WILL DO MUST DO

It was compiled on 30th June 2020

A little history on its compilation. 
Since Friday last I had been staying in the Hospital.
Ammachi was sick . 
Alone, Lila found the going very tough. 

I said we could lean on the shoulders of each other.

The day before was the 29th. Salary for June had to be disbursed. Integral duty of the Honorary  Treasurer of the KUT Seminary, Kannammoola, Trivandrum

I went there. Did what had to be done. 

There was an issue pending resolution with our Bank Branch. I had taken it up last March. The Branch Manager is a woman, an Engineer turned Banker. Very smart. Courteous. She had agreed to resolve the issue at the earliest at that time. 

When I checked, there had been no progress. 
I conversed with her. She took umbrage at the Lockdown. She had again  agreed to resolve the issue at the earliest.

I posted the Can Do,.... message to energise her.

The issue was resolved post haste.

When I revisted it I thought it may be of assistance to at least a few. 

That made me post it.

CORONA - THE BIG LEVELLER

Hospital. 

Three admissions to the ICU in as many weeks. For the hospital the patient is the moneyspinner. Bystanders, the scum of the earth. The patient is administered the finest critical care for which the bystanders pay through the nose. Those who pay are handed the short shrift.

Ammachi was in the Emergency and later in the critical care. One bystander is directed to wait in the lobby to carry out the instructions from the CCU, ICU or HD as they define it. The beauty is another has to wait beyond the front door in the open braving the elements. 

While I sat there in the open on a plastic chair I could observe the people walking in. Patients in various stages arrive. They are put through the Corona desk and the fever desk where the receptionists  are invasive and never gentle in their probes. The security personnel shout directions. Wheel chairs or trolleys are brought out and the patients are taken in, where to I wondered.

I could see the staff getting in. The guard  opens the door for them mechanically. They are efficient. They don't permit haphazard parking. 

When the Doctors or the top hierarchy drive in,  there is a big commotion. The security men run around to assist them park the vehicles. 

They salute them smartly.

But corona is a big leveller.

Like the people who seek alms, the High and the Mighty of the hospital pause before the guard. They bow and stretch out both hands in a manner similar to the ignominious who stretch their hands for alms. The guard pours the sanitizer intò the hands like amrith.  Rubbing their hands together they enter the portals.

The security personnel are among the lowest paid in almost all the organisations. The higher echelon never respect them. They are ignored contemptuously.

But Corona has made them come of age. They now command. The high and the mighty have to bow before them. 


Little EVANA and 10000 reasons



I was listening to 'one day at a time' - Cristy Lane just now.  Little EVANA  awake, got up, walked out of her room heading straight to Adukkala (Kitchen), her usual routine every day where she'd blurt out 'Ayyo,Ayyo' till she could jump on to Lila's or Ann's shoulders. She braked and fell back upon the mobile. 

Knowing her I shifted to Lynda Randle - Live, 'one day at a time'

It energised her. 

Then I switched over to 10000 reasons, Steven Samuel Devassy.

As the song came on she looked at the singer beaming. There was a radiance on her face. She touched her heart and shouted, "Ummm, Achacha, Anaanna Achacha" smiling.  She stood there transfixed, the song and her Achacha, holding her.

The rendition over she clapped and went on with her interrupted foray into the kitchen and her cutomsary theatrics.

As I watched Steven closely, I could sense she was right. The boy strikes a conclusive similarity with our dear Kunju Aaron.

Thought of sharing what I saw and what went on here  on a lazy Sunday 
morning as I reclined on my favourite seat at home, wondering where the sedate,sedentary lifestyle  would lead me.

Dr Annamma George TRIBUTE





    Dr Annamma George


Ammachi passed away at 10.20 am on  5th August 2020
Service at home at 4 pm
Funeral at Pattoor St. Thomas MarThoma Church Cemetery, Thiruvananthapuram at 5 pm

Praise the Lord for her life

Who was she?

She was perfection personified.

A wife, a sister, a mother, an aunt, a mother in law, a grand mother, a grand grand mother, a doctor of great quality, a fighter all rolled and compressed into a less than five feet frame. 

Love was the hallmark.

She laughed all the time.

Stress never stressed her. 

She was compassionate to the core.

Knew only to love.
Knew only to give.
Knew only to care. 

Never displayed her emotions openly.

Hate was anathema to her. 

Reticent. 

Religious to the core.
Never shouted from the top of the world her faith and belief. 

But she loved God. 

Knew His power sufficed for her arduous journey.

Proud she was my mother.
Sad she is gone.